Grow • Develop • Evolve
Structures grow. Seeds develop. Species evolve. Everything progresses on a timescale natural to it. Growth through birth and death, development going in phases. Evolution continues as long as energy is available, following a holistic and nonlinear path. Evolution is good or bad when seen from different perspectives, and there are always two: what is and what might be.
You can no better conduct others than you conduct yourself. It’s important who you surround yourself with. The outward structures are reflected inside you, as they must be for you to perceive them. Your outward control is only as strong as your inward understanding. You don’t need to be sane, and you aren’t really. Work to be whole and become larger.
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Listening & Speaking
Most people are not interested in what you have to say, they’re interested in what they have to say. If you want to be heard, tell them what they have to say. Most people cannot hear their own feelings. To be effective, amplify their feelings.
Leading takes energy.
Winning takes leadership and energy, but success is an illusion if the cost is too high. The true guide expends little because they design the game. The chromosome is small and stable, rarely seen or given credit. To shape an organization, do the same.
Genius & Madness
If you cannot access both, forget about marshaling either.
Reason & Emotion
Reason is bridled with narrow potential; emotion is potent and vast. A person’s truth rests on what feels right.
Powers of Perception
There is far more happening than you’re aware of, limited by what you’re willing to see. And the more you see the smaller you see yourself, and you’ll have to let go, and it may not please you. You must do this if you expect to guide others.
Change is unpopular.
The same person cannot protect and evolve, you must become two people: mother and father. Dissociate yourself into two separate people in order to release them. Introduce these parts to each other as allies although they are older than you are. Become an “us,” an army of ancestors, many captains of a larger person.
Ego is unstable, personality thin.
The ego is the shell of our self-knowledge and we protect it always. Projected on it is our personality, the bluster with which we beat our chests. We hide our fears inside it. What happens when you show an animal novelty? It will run away unless you’re careful.
Time is not linear.
Time is the metric of change. Change is regular, random, or organic, but never linear. It is not evenly paced, it’s episodic. To guide change do not think linearly think emotionally, with your heart. That is larger and more organic.
Process
It’s simple: you talk, I listen. I might listen to your words but I’ll try not to. You need to be stupid, inspired, morose, tragic, hopeful, and elated… but that comes later. First, there are just the stories, ideas, problems, and people. The ones inside you, around you, and those around them. None are real, but they look real and you’ve invested in them. Even the bad ones.
Sometimes I tell stories. I try to take you outside the box, to look at your mind, your life, your history, and your heritage. I have come to realize that very little of us is our own. Much is inherited, absorbed, or evoked in proportion to our focus, rhythms, and ancestry.
Become someone else for the purposes of exploration. You will find joy and pride close to the surface, but the real treasures are underneath. Beware that territory. It’s not what you think you came to explore but, I swear to you, you did. All true adventure comes with risk. I offer encouragement and support but you hold the flashlight. I have seen some of these things before.
Goal
You will solve your problem when you realize you are your problem, and outgrow it. I will know what you need to know because you will tell me. How else? My insight is knowing what not to say about what you’ve shown me. You are a self-enforcing tangle I’ve been asked to unravel, but you’re not going to become anything you aren’t already, or aren’t ready for.
I am an expert at avoiding your responsibility. I will accompany you through your territory and I will feel it, too, but I believe it less than you do. We look for insights and discoveries. Never underestimate the value of an old memory. Don’t be too fixed in your direction. We plow fields by turning them over in your mind.
My job is to take the picture you’ve painted, make it funny and hit you with it until you say “stop,” which you never should but will in order to reorganize, to put back in order. Some people don’t come back to order, at least not the order they came with. I can’t take credit for that. I can’t take credit for anything except making space for you.